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Baby Love
Bonding is a word that did not really mean anything other than adhesive in our language until the early 1970s when a couple of
doctors got together and decided to study what moms and babies did together.
Until then we had vague notions of what babies could or couldn't experience at birth, but generally saw the baby as more of a
property than the thinking, feeling being we know they are today. Dr. Marshall Klaus and his wife, Phyllis, wrote an incredible
book around this time, The Amazing Newborn.
This book delved into the studies of Dr. Klaus and his associate, Dr. John Kennell, and the work of others such as Ashley Montagu
and Michael Odent. It was a book for parents about the wonders and amazement of their new babies. This information gave us proof
that our babies indeed were hearing us and seeing us, that they were neither blind nor deaf at birth. It also started a
revolution of change.
The concept of bonding has come a long way in 25 years. We now look at practices in obstetrics that needlessly interfere with
bonding: separation of the mother and baby, lack of family centered maternity care, delay in breastfeeding, even something as
simply as immediate eye medication, and many other procedures that are falling by the wayside. Bonding has become a slogan for
hospitals and birth centers to advertise.
The news that babies responded to those around them was not really news to parents. They had always known that their baby could
pick them out of a crowd, or would quiet when spoken to in a certain way. Parents knew the baby, just as the baby knew them. In
studies it was universally found that babies loved the high-pitched voices, and in six different cultures it was seen that when
talking to a baby parents used falsetto voices and "baby talk," no matter what their native tongue. It all boiled down to
instinct.
We now know that babies can hear from as early as sixteen weeks gestation. What they hear and when they hear it, will determine
how they respond to that sound. For example, typically anything heard repeatedly before six months of pregnancy and the baby will
learn to sleep through this noise. Repeated sounds after the seventh month will be paid attention. So, if you've been reading the
baby a bed time story during the latter part of pregnancy, or dad has been talking to the baby, chances are that baby will want
to hear it again.
The Klaus' described how the baby reacts to the parents, how she or he has quiet alert states and learns and responds to the
environment. Using these quiet alert states, and the receptiveness of the little ones, we were able to "bond" with this baby, to
grow together in a relationship.
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